:: this is not the way i had imagined it in my mind ::

:: Saturday, April 26 ::

ok, last thoughts for the day.

live a life of faith, hope and love. (yeah, i know!!!)

AND!!

guard your thoughts...don't let your senses trap you (i have trouble with this one *sigh*....wait a minute, i have trouble with everything!! :)

anyway, in the next blog i'll try to put something totally nonsensical. (meanwhile anyone reading this is probably saying its all been nonsense from the beginning anyway! *laugh*)

later
:: 10:11 PM [+] ::
...

hello again.....i must be on some sort of roll or something. three blogs and all in the same week. its a minor miracle. anyway, i know a lot of people don't like religious things but i read this earlier this morning and i wanted to share it. here it goes. (i'll add a few of my own comments in parenthesis)

"finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy--meditate on these things. (phil. 4:8 nkjv)

(and then there is a little lesson after it...oh joy! :) --> you should probably be more concerned with the lyrics of the songs (the things that you read, the people that you talk to, the things that you say and do) than the style of music. so put your cd collection (your life....everything!!) through the phillipians 4:8 test. do any of the lyrics oppose the teaching of paul in verse 8? if what you are listening to (reading, watching, doing, saying etc. etc.) makes you think about things that are impure, wrong, or immoral, it fails the test. you may not think that what you listen to (etc etc :) is that big of a deal. after all, it's just background music right (its perfectly harmless)? wrong. even if you only listen to music when you're driving in the car, what you put into your mind simmers there and eventually comes back out. the same goes for the telelvision shows and movies you watch (the things you read, the people you hang out with etc. etc.). don't lower your standards when it comes to what you watch and listen to(read, do, say etc. etc. :). if you're having trouble knowing what those standards should be, put it through the "4:8" test. paul lays it out pretty plain and simple. if it doesn't match with what paul says we should meditate on, then turn it off (put it away).

*laugh* ok, i'm not trying to point fingers at anyone and say they are this or that and wrong....bad! bad! and i'm not saying to throw away everything and everyone. i just read it, liked it (not that i follow it either all the time *sigh*), and put it up. i hope you like it too. later!
:: 9:53 AM [+] ::
...

two days in a row....quite unusual but it was brought to my attention today by some that i sent a link to that there was confusion as to who's page this is. it's mine...me...ivana....aka kerry. ok? anyway, i don't really have anything earth shattering to share tonigt...maybe later. but my brother did send me one of those get to know your neighbors and friends emails that i never sent back to him and i thought i'd just post it here. booooorriiinngg! yeah, i know...but its my page. enjoy!


THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF ...

1. What time is it? 10:06 p.m.

2. Name as it appears on your birth certificate: well you guys already know my name...except maybe my middle name which is renee

3. Nickname (s): Kerry

4. Parents names: Ivan and Delphina

5. Number of candles that appeared on your last birthday cake: didn't have a birthday cake

6. Date that you regularly blow them out: March 19

7. Pets: do my tye-dyed fluffy slippers count?

9. Piercing: none

10. Eye color: brown

11. Height: about 5'1 or so

12. Hometown: New York....

14. Favorite Food: i have many different foods i like but i've just recently discovered the delights of the delicious lemon crumble bar they sell at starbucks. yummy!

16. Been toilet papering? twice

17. Loved somebody so much it made you cry? yes

18. Been in a car accident? yes

19. Croutons or bacon bits? croutons

20. Sprite or 7up? sprite i think

21. Favorite Movie? again i like lots of movies.....one of my favorites that i've just rewatched though is dogfight

22. Favorite Holiday? anything that will give me days off!

23. Favorite day of the week: Friday

24. Favorite word or phrase: who me?

25. Favorite restaurant: don't have a favorite.

26. Favorite toothpaste: toothpaste?

27. Favorite flowers: i know, i know....boring but i don't have a favorite of that either!

28. Favorite drink: i like orange juice

29. Favorite sport to watch: not really into watching sports

30. Preferred type of ice cream: anything!! chocolate, vanilla, pralines and cream, etc etc etc!!!

31. Favorite Sesame Street Character: Grover

32. Disney or Warner Bros.: i like them both.

33. Favorite Fast Food Restaurant: McDonalds (sometimes taco bell and thats only because i hardly ever go)

34. When was your last hospital stay? when i was a baby.

35. What color is your bedroom carpet? a kind of blue

36. How many times did you fail your drivers test? once

37. Who was the last person you got email from? besides junk email....margie

38. Do you sing in the shower? *laugh* not usually

39. Single store would you choose to max out your credit card? credit card?

40. What do you do most often when you get bored? read, watch tv, go online, read.

41. Name the person that you are friends with who lives the farthest away: i'll just put initials...r.r.

42. Bedtime: various times......i don't have a set one.

43. Who will respond to this email the quickest?

44. Who is the person you sent this email to that is least likely to
respond?

45. Favorite TV show: i like a few different t.v. shows but to name one.....i like alias.

46. Last person you went out to dinner with: beverley and kevin

47. Ford or Chevy? neither

48. Time you finished this email: 10:21 p.m.

49. Mary Ann or Ginger? mary ann or ginger what?




:: 10:22 PM [+] ::
...

ok, so i'm not sure what to put here so if it doesn't make any sense too bad. no one's supposed to be reading this anyway, unless of course i gave you the web address. so it doesn't matter what i say. anyway, i'm here at about 11:57p.m. surfing and listening to one of linkin parks new songs.....somewhere i belong. here are the lyrics:

(When this began)
I had nothing to say
And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me
(I was confused)
And I let it all out to find
That I’m not the only person with these things in mind
(Inside of me)
But all that they can see the words revealed
Is the only real thing that I’ve got left to feel
(Nothing to lose)
Just stuck, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own

[Chorus]
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long
(Erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong

And I’ve got nothing to say
I can’t believe I didn’t fall right down on my face
(I was confused)
Looking everywhere only to find
That it’s not the way I had imagined it all in my mind
(So what am I)
What do I have but negativity
’Cause I can’t justify the way, everyone is looking at me
(Nothing to lose)
Nothing to gain, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own

[Repeat Chorus]

I will never know myself until I do this on my own
And I will never feel anything else until my wounds are healed
I will never be anything till I break away from me
I will break away, I'll find myself today

[Repeat Chorus]

I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
Somewhere I belong


i really like the song.....or maybe i'm just depressed.

p.s.
i'm not sure how often i'm going to update this thing now that i've started it but if you're interested you can check back whenever you feel like it.

:: 12:00 AM [+] ::
...